Wednesday, November 28, 2007
VIDEO OF THE YEAR!!!
First off let me tell you how much I love Snoop Dogg. This video however, just made me love him even more. This is so Prince circa 1984....and he totally raided Bootsy Collins closet with his sparkly get-up and huge glasses
OMG....And he has a KEYTAR!
Im not sold on the song yet because this T-Pain/Cher Vocoder voice thing is getting out of hand...but it is Snoop Dogg so he can do whatever he wants. He basically wins at life.
So PIMP-A-LICIOUS!
(I totally want to be like the gay Snoop Dogg....pimpin ho's and smackin bitches...except all mine would have penises and look like this)
Tuesday, November 27, 2007
Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade Pics (Finally)
I finally uploaded the pics to my computer so I figured I'd throw them up here...since I said I was gonna do it previously.....
The Inflation...The Night Before.
The Big Day.....
Dora The Explorer (Remember what I said about that kid in your class Matt)
Good Charlotte (Didn't want to wave to the kids...lost points in my book bitches. Im sorry, you cannot be hard RAWK on a damn float...so stop frontin and wave to the fucking kids)
Jonas Brothers (Kinda cute...and kinda jailbait....Chris Hansen don't come for me.....mmmkay?)
Kermy!!!
Pickachu (Is it bad that I used to love Pokemon back in the day?...LOL)
Shrek
The Inflation...The Night Before.
The Big Day.....
Dora The Explorer (Remember what I said about that kid in your class Matt)
Good Charlotte (Didn't want to wave to the kids...lost points in my book bitches. Im sorry, you cannot be hard RAWK on a damn float...so stop frontin and wave to the fucking kids)
Jonas Brothers (Kinda cute...and kinda jailbait....Chris Hansen don't come for me.....mmmkay?)
Kermy!!!
Pickachu (Is it bad that I used to love Pokemon back in the day?...LOL)
Shrek
Monday, November 26, 2007
You Know How I Know You're Gay?
So everyone remembers this exchange from the 40 Year Old Virgin b/t Paul Rudd and Seth Rogen right? If not, let's jog your memory......
So anyways...it was a shitty day today in NYC and I didn't go out in the afternoon like I usually do before my evening class. I really should have been working on YET ANOTHER paper...LOL....but I got so disenchanted with the whole thing that decided to watch this movie. It always puts a smile on my face but today it did a little something extra for me.....
When I got to this scene I paused it, and for whatever reason decided to do my own internal version of this scene....LMAO. Crazy I know....but taking inventory of my room and using it as material in this crazy exchange lead to some very funny results....at least IMO.
Internal K: You Know How I Know You're Gay?
Me: Because I like cock?
Internal K: Well besides that....
Me: No, why
Internal K: Welllll you just bought a cashmere scarf
Me: So, its getting cold...that's perfectly acceptable
Internal K: But you also got matching finger gloves to go with it...
Me: Ummm so? Those are functional..I can't handle shit w/ regular gloves on...plus I can't use my phone unless my fingers are physically in contact with the screen.
Internal K: Whatever, you know that shit looks gay...
Me: Fuck You
Internal K: Hey K....you also wanna know how I know your gay?
Me: Ugh...how?
Internal K: Because you've been humming this lil diddy all day
Me: Hey listen...that song is catchy...I can't help it!
Internal K: Whatever, you know you're about to put that shit on rotation on ur iPod....don't even front!
Me: I'm not apologizing for that...go to hell!
Internal K: Hey hey....you also wanna know how I know you're gay?
K: What is it now?
Internal K: You were flipping out this morning when you found out that you were almost out of a this
K: Soooo? My skin gets dry and I'm not trying to have sun damage at 23....
Internal K: So gay!
K: Ughhhh
So anyways...it was a shitty day today in NYC and I didn't go out in the afternoon like I usually do before my evening class. I really should have been working on YET ANOTHER paper...LOL....but I got so disenchanted with the whole thing that decided to watch this movie. It always puts a smile on my face but today it did a little something extra for me.....
When I got to this scene I paused it, and for whatever reason decided to do my own internal version of this scene....LMAO. Crazy I know....but taking inventory of my room and using it as material in this crazy exchange lead to some very funny results....at least IMO.
Internal K: You Know How I Know You're Gay?
Me: Because I like cock?
Internal K: Well besides that....
Me: No, why
Internal K: Welllll you just bought a cashmere scarf
Me: So, its getting cold...that's perfectly acceptable
Internal K: But you also got matching finger gloves to go with it...
Me: Ummm so? Those are functional..I can't handle shit w/ regular gloves on...plus I can't use my phone unless my fingers are physically in contact with the screen.
Internal K: Whatever, you know that shit looks gay...
Me: Fuck You
Internal K: Hey K....you also wanna know how I know your gay?
Me: Ugh...how?
Internal K: Because you've been humming this lil diddy all day
Me: Hey listen...that song is catchy...I can't help it!
Internal K: Whatever, you know you're about to put that shit on rotation on ur iPod....don't even front!
Me: I'm not apologizing for that...go to hell!
Internal K: Hey hey....you also wanna know how I know you're gay?
K: What is it now?
Internal K: You were flipping out this morning when you found out that you were almost out of a this
K: Soooo? My skin gets dry and I'm not trying to have sun damage at 23....
Internal K: So gay!
K: Ughhhh
Thursday, November 22, 2007
How Do I Keep On Getting Into These Ridiculous Situations? (NSFW)
So in addition to being thankful for my family, friends, health and strength....I also have to take time out to be thankful for amazing bowel control...seeing as tho I was quite close to shitting myself this afternoon.
Why you ask?
Because.........my friends.........I WAS A FOOT AWAY from a real life porn star on the subway.....
I dunno if any of you are familiar with Roman Ragazzi but he is relatively new porn star who works with Raging Stallion, Collin O'Neal and some other studios. Please don't ask me how I know this information......a little birdie told me........I SWEAR TO YOU!
Those of you who are unfamiliar with his....ahem...."works" can familiarize yourselves by clicking here, here, here, here, here, annnnnddddddd here. You know, for educational/informational purposes only........
Anywho, back to my story. So CNN Boy and I were coming back from the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade (which was really plesant by the way...I will throw some pics up later....but this takes precedence LOL!) So as usual, we were having a good time taking pictures, laughing at the corniness of some of the floats/costumes....blah blah blah. Eventually we decided that we were hungry and since we were right near a B/C station......we decided to hop on the C.....take it downtown and see if anything good was open.
While we were on the train, I suggested that we get off at 14th......not because I had some ulterior motive behind roaming around Chelsea (LOL...i'm actually serious) but because I know that there is this great 24hr diner on 16th and 6th that I had a feeling would be open for Thanksgiving.
So we got off the train and we were chatting about something in particular.......which kinda escapes me right now....but honestly, it's irrelevant. LOL! What IS relevant however is the fact that I when I looked up (CNN Boy was lagging behind like two steps to my left and I was walking up the right hand of the stairs) freakin' Roman Ragazzi was two steps in front of my face...coming down the stairs!
Those of you out there with a grasp of trigonometry...along with a knack for constructing a good mental picture will realize that standing at 5'10 myself coupled with being situated about 2 steps down from Mr. Ragazzi would put my line of sight squarely....AT CROTCH LEVEL. LMAO!
This is a problem for a VARIETY of reasons........
#1: I did not realize it was him until my eyes traveled up his body (reflexively of course....shit...I am a gay man...you cant put a package like that in my face without expecting me to find out who it belongs to!)
#2: It left me in an EXTREMELY vulnerable position because after I saw his face, I was frozen for what seemed like forever! I mean, I've seen you in porn and now you are right in front of my fucking face irl! Shoot...I'm slick, but it is really hard to play shit like that off.....I've seen your peen for goodness sakes!
#3: I wasn't alone.....a fact that became INCREDIBLY EVIDENT when I heard CNN Boy finally come up on my left and pass me. That clearly brought me back to Mother Earth because I quickly side-stepped to my left to follow behind. Before I did tho...I looked back up at Roman's face....and he was wearing THE EXACT same expression as in the first pic above. Now I cannot decipher this look...it's somewhere between sexy/smoldering and mild annoyance. Seeing as tho I WAS in his way....and I am not physically impressive in the slightest....I am going to go with mild annoyance, however he generally seems like a pretty serious guy...so maybe that is just how his face is naturally...who knows?
Anyways.....when we got up the stairs, an interesting conversation ensued..............
CNN Boy: Had a hard time getting out of Rambo's way? {laughes}
Me: Wai.......whaaa?
CNN Boy: That guy back there {turns and points} he is like a fucking action figure
Me: {Insert nervous laugh} Yea, he is pretty swole
CNN Boy: He reminds me of those balloons we just saw...I bet if you poked him with a pin he would deflate {guffaws}
Me: HaHa....ur just angry because you've been hitting the gym and ur still scrawny like whoa!
CNN Boy: Fuck You!
Me: LMAO!
Soooooo, sitting back and thinking about it now.....I think I may have perhaps inadvertently 'kinda sorta' outed myself to CNN Boy. I mean clearly I was staring at Roman for a substantial amount of time...otherwise he wouldn't have had a reason to bring the whole 'getting out of Rambo's way' thing. He must be asking himself why on earth I was frozen in place when I saw him. The only silver lining of this whole fiasco is the fact that since CNN Boy is straight, there is really no way in hell he would know who Roman Ragazzi was because he only does gay porn. But then again.....I was staring at an attractive guy for who knows how long....and with him (CNN Boy) being situated behind me and to the left....he would probably be in the best position to observe my body language & facial expressions when I was in front of him. It doesn't make it any easier to explain...whether he is a random hot guy...or a major studio porn star...HE IS STILL A GUY...AND I WAS STARING [apparently].
I spent most of the day with CNN Boy...and he didn't act any differently or awkward towards me....so maybe I'm just over-thinking this. I can't help to think that I opened a can of worms today tho. We are good friends.....and I have no reason to think that he would take the news badly...he is a pretty liberal guy...but I'm just not ready to tell him yet, ya know? And I don't really want to be outed by freezing up in front of a porn star....haha. I'm gonna have to learn to control myself better.
But he was fucking hot.....10x better looking in person!
And built like a fucking...........
HOUSE!!!!
Why you ask?
Because.........my friends.........I WAS A FOOT AWAY from a real life porn star on the subway.....
I dunno if any of you are familiar with Roman Ragazzi but he is relatively new porn star who works with Raging Stallion, Collin O'Neal and some other studios. Please don't ask me how I know this information......a little birdie told me........I SWEAR TO YOU!
Those of you who are unfamiliar with his....ahem...."works" can familiarize yourselves by clicking here, here, here, here, here, annnnnddddddd here. You know, for educational/informational purposes only........
Anywho, back to my story. So CNN Boy and I were coming back from the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade (which was really plesant by the way...I will throw some pics up later....but this takes precedence LOL!) So as usual, we were having a good time taking pictures, laughing at the corniness of some of the floats/costumes....blah blah blah. Eventually we decided that we were hungry and since we were right near a B/C station......we decided to hop on the C.....take it downtown and see if anything good was open.
While we were on the train, I suggested that we get off at 14th......not because I had some ulterior motive behind roaming around Chelsea (LOL...i'm actually serious) but because I know that there is this great 24hr diner on 16th and 6th that I had a feeling would be open for Thanksgiving.
So we got off the train and we were chatting about something in particular.......which kinda escapes me right now....but honestly, it's irrelevant. LOL! What IS relevant however is the fact that I when I looked up (CNN Boy was lagging behind like two steps to my left and I was walking up the right hand of the stairs) freakin' Roman Ragazzi was two steps in front of my face...coming down the stairs!
Those of you out there with a grasp of trigonometry...along with a knack for constructing a good mental picture will realize that standing at 5'10 myself coupled with being situated about 2 steps down from Mr. Ragazzi would put my line of sight squarely....AT CROTCH LEVEL. LMAO!
This is a problem for a VARIETY of reasons........
#1: I did not realize it was him until my eyes traveled up his body (reflexively of course....shit...I am a gay man...you cant put a package like that in my face without expecting me to find out who it belongs to!)
#2: It left me in an EXTREMELY vulnerable position because after I saw his face, I was frozen for what seemed like forever! I mean, I've seen you in porn and now you are right in front of my fucking face irl! Shoot...I'm slick, but it is really hard to play shit like that off.....I've seen your peen for goodness sakes!
#3: I wasn't alone.....a fact that became INCREDIBLY EVIDENT when I heard CNN Boy finally come up on my left and pass me. That clearly brought me back to Mother Earth because I quickly side-stepped to my left to follow behind. Before I did tho...I looked back up at Roman's face....and he was wearing THE EXACT same expression as in the first pic above. Now I cannot decipher this look...it's somewhere between sexy/smoldering and mild annoyance. Seeing as tho I WAS in his way....and I am not physically impressive in the slightest....I am going to go with mild annoyance, however he generally seems like a pretty serious guy...so maybe that is just how his face is naturally...who knows?
Anyways.....when we got up the stairs, an interesting conversation ensued..............
CNN Boy: Had a hard time getting out of Rambo's way? {laughes}
Me: Wai.......whaaa?
CNN Boy: That guy back there {turns and points} he is like a fucking action figure
Me: {Insert nervous laugh} Yea, he is pretty swole
CNN Boy: He reminds me of those balloons we just saw...I bet if you poked him with a pin he would deflate {guffaws}
Me: HaHa....ur just angry because you've been hitting the gym and ur still scrawny like whoa!
CNN Boy: Fuck You!
Me: LMAO!
Soooooo, sitting back and thinking about it now.....I think I may have perhaps inadvertently 'kinda sorta' outed myself to CNN Boy. I mean clearly I was staring at Roman for a substantial amount of time...otherwise he wouldn't have had a reason to bring the whole 'getting out of Rambo's way' thing. He must be asking himself why on earth I was frozen in place when I saw him. The only silver lining of this whole fiasco is the fact that since CNN Boy is straight, there is really no way in hell he would know who Roman Ragazzi was because he only does gay porn. But then again.....I was staring at an attractive guy for who knows how long....and with him (CNN Boy) being situated behind me and to the left....he would probably be in the best position to observe my body language & facial expressions when I was in front of him. It doesn't make it any easier to explain...whether he is a random hot guy...or a major studio porn star...HE IS STILL A GUY...AND I WAS STARING [apparently].
I spent most of the day with CNN Boy...and he didn't act any differently or awkward towards me....so maybe I'm just over-thinking this. I can't help to think that I opened a can of worms today tho. We are good friends.....and I have no reason to think that he would take the news badly...he is a pretty liberal guy...but I'm just not ready to tell him yet, ya know? And I don't really want to be outed by freezing up in front of a porn star....haha. I'm gonna have to learn to control myself better.
But he was fucking hot.....10x better looking in person!
And built like a fucking...........
HOUSE!!!!
Wednesday, November 21, 2007
Happy Thanksgiving Peeps!
I hope everyone (in the US at least) has a great day tomorrow with their families! Have fun, and don't gorge yourselves!
This is gonna be a kinda weird Thanksgiving for me because im not going home, however so many of my friends are in the same boat that we all came together and made reservations at this really nice restaurant. So I guess this is the NYC way of doing Thanksgiving....haha!
Kinda excited for the Macy's Parade tomorrow too....I always used to watch it in the mornings while my Momz and Granny threw down in the kitchen...now I get to see it in person. Pray that it isn't too cold!
Have a good one.....and don't forget Black Friday....I expect all of you to be good mo's and throw down @ the mall....LOL!
Sunday, November 18, 2007
Oh, The Things I Would Do To You......
The real question is........
At what point do I finally admit to myself that I have a HUGE infatuation problem with this guy? I swear to God, the day I see him in person is the day you will see my mug-shot plastered on E!/Entertainment Tonight/Access Hollywood because I will surely be arrested for mauling him in public......
{And it'll be totally worth it BTW}
Source
Source
Friday, November 16, 2007
You Know You Need A Vacation When.......
You walk outside in your work clothes...and all the way down to your subway station (6 blocks) before you realize that you are still wearing these........
Bonus points for actually standing there for about 3 seconds 'actually' contemplating whether or not to go back and change them......
I did by the way.....begrudgingly of course (they are so comfortable)
Someone book me a ticket to Rio or sumthin so I can find me a hot Brazilian stud...LOL!
Bonus points for actually standing there for about 3 seconds 'actually' contemplating whether or not to go back and change them......
I did by the way.....begrudgingly of course (they are so comfortable)
Someone book me a ticket to Rio or sumthin so I can find me a hot Brazilian stud...LOL!
Thursday, November 15, 2007
Hollywood...Stop Ruining My Childhood!!!!!
Ok, I really should be writing a paper right now but something has been brought to my attn that I just have to rant about for a second.
One of my friends from back home just emailed to inform me that Twentieth Century Fox is going to be remaking one of my all time favorite cartoons growing up.......Dragon Ball Z
THIS IS UNACCEPTABLE!!!!
Even more egregious is the fact that they cast Justin Chatwin as Goku. (the main character of the series for those who are not familiar with the cartoon or original comic)
Who was in charge of casting for this bitch?
Justin Chatwin?
Really?
Was there no one else?
Do you see it?
Because I really can't.....
And by the way....how are you gonna make a Dragon Ball Z movie without Vegeta as the primary villain?
Bottom line, Hollywood this is an open letter....
Please, stop raping my childhood by producing these half-assed remakes of my favorite cartoons/shows/series with shitty casting and even shittier plot-lines. Just stop now! Be original and come up with a new and exciting concept and leave well enough alone. Gosh, and just when I finally getting *used* to a live-action remake of Speed Racer (which actually has pretty good casting) someone has to go and steal another piece of my childhood, ugh! Warner Brothers is even doing a remake of Thundercats for goodness sake!
IS NOTHING SACRED ANYMORE?
One of my friends from back home just emailed to inform me that Twentieth Century Fox is going to be remaking one of my all time favorite cartoons growing up.......Dragon Ball Z
THIS IS UNACCEPTABLE!!!!
Even more egregious is the fact that they cast Justin Chatwin as Goku. (the main character of the series for those who are not familiar with the cartoon or original comic)
Who was in charge of casting for this bitch?
Justin Chatwin?
Really?
Was there no one else?
Do you see it?
Because I really can't.....
And by the way....how are you gonna make a Dragon Ball Z movie without Vegeta as the primary villain?
Bottom line, Hollywood this is an open letter....
Please, stop raping my childhood by producing these half-assed remakes of my favorite cartoons/shows/series with shitty casting and even shittier plot-lines. Just stop now! Be original and come up with a new and exciting concept and leave well enough alone. Gosh, and just when I finally getting *used* to a live-action remake of Speed Racer (which actually has pretty good casting) someone has to go and steal another piece of my childhood, ugh! Warner Brothers is even doing a remake of Thundercats for goodness sake!
IS NOTHING SACRED ANYMORE?
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
Explain Plz.....
I was having a chat with Pete the other day about guys who we kinda think are overrated. I have actually had this conversation with a lot of you but just never got around to blogging about it...it has just been here collecting dust, haha. Anyways, I decided to compile a list (in no particular order) of guys who I, for the life of me......cannot understand what the big hub-bub is about. This is not to say that I wouldn't fool around with any of the guys if I had a chance (save for Tom..ugh) but I just really don't get all the swooning...haha! Feel free to add, disagree or rant/rave in general.
Brad Pitt
Justin Timberlake
Tom Cruise
Johnathan Rhys Myers
Leo DiCaprio
Mika (this one is for Pete...i'll co-sign)
Zac Efron
**I really want to find him attractive but I think the reason why I can't is because he reminds me SO MUCH of Peter Pan....and he always scared the shit out of me as a boy** {shivers}
P.S....no shit about me taking 'unflattering' pics of these guys to make my point.....I am doing all recent and neutral looking pics. (aka not a lot of airbrushing)
Brad Pitt
Justin Timberlake
Tom Cruise
Johnathan Rhys Myers
Leo DiCaprio
Mika (this one is for Pete...i'll co-sign)
Zac Efron
**I really want to find him attractive but I think the reason why I can't is because he reminds me SO MUCH of Peter Pan....and he always scared the shit out of me as a boy** {shivers}
P.S....no shit about me taking 'unflattering' pics of these guys to make my point.....I am doing all recent and neutral looking pics. (aka not a lot of airbrushing)
Saturday, November 10, 2007
Kinda Upset....Not Gonna Lie
So I got all my midterms back...and the results aren't so good. I got an A in Research/Statistical Methods (which is great) but I got a B in Organizational Psychology....what the fuck is that? That shit is supposed to be my easiest class this semester and I fucked it up. And please.....let's not even get into Neuropsychology...it is depressing.
BOOOOOOO!!!!
Let's just say that I have been definitely 'enjoying myself' a bit to much in the city and I really need to buckle down if I am gonna close up this semester well. I think i've been going out with friends and galavanting around town too much. HAHA! Add that to the fact that I basically haven't upgraded my study habits to get in line with grad school expectations....LOL! Silly me thinking that I could get by with the same effort that I put into undergrad......kinda sorta figuring out that isn't gonna cut it at all. Ooops!
Oh wells....needless to say that you probably will not find me online (blogging/chatting) with as much frequency as I have in the past......unless of course something monumental occurs...haha! It's time for K to hit the books!
Cuz you know Mommy and Daddy K are not paying thousands of dollars to send me to school so I can come home with B's.
(Not to mention they would prob lock me out of the house at Christmas...hehe!)
BOOOOOOO!!!!
Let's just say that I have been definitely 'enjoying myself' a bit to much in the city and I really need to buckle down if I am gonna close up this semester well. I think i've been going out with friends and galavanting around town too much. HAHA! Add that to the fact that I basically haven't upgraded my study habits to get in line with grad school expectations....LOL! Silly me thinking that I could get by with the same effort that I put into undergrad......kinda sorta figuring out that isn't gonna cut it at all. Ooops!
Oh wells....needless to say that you probably will not find me online (blogging/chatting) with as much frequency as I have in the past......unless of course something monumental occurs...haha! It's time for K to hit the books!
Cuz you know Mommy and Daddy K are not paying thousands of dollars to send me to school so I can come home with B's.
(Not to mention they would prob lock me out of the house at Christmas...hehe!)
Thursday, November 8, 2007
OMG, Guessssss Who Came Into My Store Today!
{Squeeeaaallllsssss}
OMG....MOTHERFUCKING ex-UF Quarterback and former 5th season star of The Bachelor Jesse Palmer came into my store today....and we all basically passed out (gay men and women respectively)
You have never seen 3 gay men and 2 women run so fast in your entire life...REAL TALK!
I totally noticed him first out of the corner of my eye. I'm like...."K, isn't he famous....OMG...where do you know him from?" So then I turned to my co-worker (I'll call her Rudy...because she looks like an adult version of Rudy from the Cosby Show) and I was like.....
Me: Rudy.....that guy is famous....he plays football but I can't remember for who.
Rudy: Nananana......he's um......{snaps fingers}
Me: Come on....I know it, it's like right here!
Rudy: Na, he was on TV...ummmmmm
Me: No girl....he plays football...he is a football star...come on...help me!
Rudy: Like I know shit about football {rolls eyes and laughs}
Then the floor manager for the shift comes behind us after ringing up a customer....I'll call her Miss Blue Eyes...because she has these ridiculously blue eyes and she seems to see everything that is going on at once.....a real owl (love her to bits)
Miss Blue Eyes: OMG THATS THE BACHELOR GIRRRLLLL!
Rudy: OOOOOO YOU RIGHT GIRL!!!!!!!
So then.....not to be left out, I mockingly go......
Me: NOTAAAHHH GIRLLLLL!!!!!
Rudy: LOL's {slaps thigh}
Miss Blue Eyes: {snickers}
Rudy: OMG...who's gonna help him
Me: Na....I'm going over there now....
Miss Blue Eyes: Best not touch my man!!!!!!
Me & Rudy: LOL
So then I guess because we were making a commotion the other two guys on the floor came over to the cash wrap to see what was popping. One of them..I will name Brazilian Twink...because....well...he looks like a Brazilian Twink, LOL! The other one I'm gonna call Stoned Bell because he seriously looks like a stoned version of Drake Bell. This kid seriously.....always looks high. And he always looks like he is really concentrating on what you are saying as if you are explaining the Laws of Thermodynamics to him....
I don't want you guys to think that I am talking shit about him tho...because I am not....he is seriously one of, if not my favorite person in the store. A really cool, chill, gay guy (taken unfortunately)....but yea we always have a good time and he is someone who I would actually hang out with in real life.
Ok, back to my Bachelor.....
Brazilian Twink: Why aren't you bitches working? {jokingly}
Miss Blue Eyes: The Bachelor just came into our store....OMG is he still a bachelor...because I'm seriously still looking
Stoned Bell: I've never seen that kat before....but heeee's hot
Brazilian Twink: OMG HE IS GORG {clutches imaginary pearls}
Rudy: Y'all are crazy!!!!!
Me: Is no one gonna go over there and help him?
Brazilian Twink: I'll go!
Stoned Bell: I'll stare....
Miss Blue Eyes: {snatches the fitting room key and runs over}
Me: Damn..she wasn't kidding
Rudy: Missed your chance K!
Me: Fuck it....i'll just admire from a distance....
Brazilian Twink: God he is tall!
Stoned Bell: I know...right!?!?!
Me: For the life of me I know he played football...but I can't remember for what team {your Alma Mater fucking dipshit!!!}
Brazilian Twink: I wanna know what team he plays for tooooooooo!
Me & Stoned Bell: {rolls eyes and collectively sighs}
Me: He is straight man....good luck with that
Stoned Bell: I'm pickin up major hetro vibes too bro
Brazilian Twink: God....I can dream...whatever {flips hands in the air and walks to womens}
LOL...so yea, I left to help with another customer who walked in and Stoned Bell went to restock some tables. Miss Blue Eyes continued to help Jesse and she seriously looked like she was utilizing every bit of willpower not to jump on him. I can't blame homegirl......it is prob a good thing that I didn't go over there to help him myself because I would have totally ended up embarrassing myself. UGH!
P.S. When I came home and checked his Wikipedia I realized that HE DID play college football for the Gators....and professionally for the Giants and the 49's. I also found out that we were born in the same city (Toronto). UGGGHHHH we would have had SOOOO much to chat about...
FUCK!!!!
I shoulda tripped Miss Blue Eyes and got to him first!
Whatever....I got a consolation prize when I helped another customer into the fitting room tho. He was taking off a vest (with nothing underneath it I might add) and he 'failed' to close his fitting room door. What an exhibitionist!!! I definitely saw torso since he was in mid-lift...and boys........FANTASTIC BODY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
FUCKING FANTASTIC.....and we will leave it at that!
I love retail!
OMG....MOTHERFUCKING ex-UF Quarterback and former 5th season star of The Bachelor Jesse Palmer came into my store today....and we all basically passed out (gay men and women respectively)
You have never seen 3 gay men and 2 women run so fast in your entire life...REAL TALK!
I totally noticed him first out of the corner of my eye. I'm like...."K, isn't he famous....OMG...where do you know him from?" So then I turned to my co-worker (I'll call her Rudy...because she looks like an adult version of Rudy from the Cosby Show) and I was like.....
Me: Rudy.....that guy is famous....he plays football but I can't remember for who.
Rudy: Nananana......he's um......{snaps fingers}
Me: Come on....I know it, it's like right here!
Rudy: Na, he was on TV...ummmmmm
Me: No girl....he plays football...he is a football star...come on...help me!
Rudy: Like I know shit about football {rolls eyes and laughs}
Then the floor manager for the shift comes behind us after ringing up a customer....I'll call her Miss Blue Eyes...because she has these ridiculously blue eyes and she seems to see everything that is going on at once.....a real owl (love her to bits)
Miss Blue Eyes: OMG THATS THE BACHELOR GIRRRLLLL!
Rudy: OOOOOO YOU RIGHT GIRL!!!!!!!
So then.....not to be left out, I mockingly go......
Me: NOTAAAHHH GIRLLLLL!!!!!
Rudy: LOL's {slaps thigh}
Miss Blue Eyes: {snickers}
Rudy: OMG...who's gonna help him
Me: Na....I'm going over there now....
Miss Blue Eyes: Best not touch my man!!!!!!
Me & Rudy: LOL
So then I guess because we were making a commotion the other two guys on the floor came over to the cash wrap to see what was popping. One of them..I will name Brazilian Twink...because....well...he looks like a Brazilian Twink, LOL! The other one I'm gonna call Stoned Bell because he seriously looks like a stoned version of Drake Bell. This kid seriously.....always looks high. And he always looks like he is really concentrating on what you are saying as if you are explaining the Laws of Thermodynamics to him....
I don't want you guys to think that I am talking shit about him tho...because I am not....he is seriously one of, if not my favorite person in the store. A really cool, chill, gay guy (taken unfortunately)....but yea we always have a good time and he is someone who I would actually hang out with in real life.
Ok, back to my Bachelor.....
Brazilian Twink: Why aren't you bitches working? {jokingly}
Miss Blue Eyes: The Bachelor just came into our store....OMG is he still a bachelor...because I'm seriously still looking
Stoned Bell: I've never seen that kat before....but heeee's hot
Brazilian Twink: OMG HE IS GORG {clutches imaginary pearls}
Rudy: Y'all are crazy!!!!!
Me: Is no one gonna go over there and help him?
Brazilian Twink: I'll go!
Stoned Bell: I'll stare....
Miss Blue Eyes: {snatches the fitting room key and runs over}
Me: Damn..she wasn't kidding
Rudy: Missed your chance K!
Me: Fuck it....i'll just admire from a distance....
Brazilian Twink: God he is tall!
Stoned Bell: I know...right!?!?!
Me: For the life of me I know he played football...but I can't remember for what team {your Alma Mater fucking dipshit!!!}
Brazilian Twink: I wanna know what team he plays for tooooooooo!
Me & Stoned Bell: {rolls eyes and collectively sighs}
Me: He is straight man....good luck with that
Stoned Bell: I'm pickin up major hetro vibes too bro
Brazilian Twink: God....I can dream...whatever {flips hands in the air and walks to womens}
LOL...so yea, I left to help with another customer who walked in and Stoned Bell went to restock some tables. Miss Blue Eyes continued to help Jesse and she seriously looked like she was utilizing every bit of willpower not to jump on him. I can't blame homegirl......it is prob a good thing that I didn't go over there to help him myself because I would have totally ended up embarrassing myself. UGH!
P.S. When I came home and checked his Wikipedia I realized that HE DID play college football for the Gators....and professionally for the Giants and the 49's. I also found out that we were born in the same city (Toronto). UGGGHHHH we would have had SOOOO much to chat about...
FUCK!!!!
I shoulda tripped Miss Blue Eyes and got to him first!
Whatever....I got a consolation prize when I helped another customer into the fitting room tho. He was taking off a vest (with nothing underneath it I might add) and he 'failed' to close his fitting room door. What an exhibitionist!!! I definitely saw torso since he was in mid-lift...and boys........FANTASTIC BODY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
FUCKING FANTASTIC.....and we will leave it at that!
I love retail!
Tuesday, November 6, 2007
The Aftermath....
Title of this post seems kinda dramatic no?
Haha..it's not really. I have no cruising stories or coming out stories....just good, clean fun over my birthday weekend. I got a chance to meet some really cool people, hang at some cool places and overall....I had a great time. Let's start on Friday....
Rocket Scientist came in late the previous night so we woke up late a did a bit of shopping around town. It was fun to hang with him again because we always have such a great time together. Our sense of humor is really quite similar so we end up putting each other in stitches whenever we are together. We bought some new threads for the weekend festivities and met up with some mutual friends who were working around the city.
For dinner...me, Rocket Scientist, CNN Boy and PR Boy hit up this really amazing restaurant called SAPA in Midtown (or I guess it is more of the Flatiron District...I dunno....it is never clear cut) I guess the food could be categorized as Asian Fusion.....who knows....all I know it was AMAZING. The drinks were delicious and I was sipping on Cosmojito's the entire night. You think that is a gay enough drink? HAHAHA! Rocket Scientist made fun of me for ordering such a "fruity cocktail" until he had a sip and got one for himself. HYPOCRITE! You know that shit was off the chain!
As good as the food and drinks were.....the space is really the main draw of the entire restaurant. I think it is an old, converted warehouse of some sort because the ceilings were incredibly high. There were candles everywhere and all the decorations/funiture really worked together to make a great atmosphere IMO. It is definitely a great restaurant to impress a date....haha.
And the bathrooms are fucking ridiculous.....there is like a wading pool in the middle of the floor with 'cabana like' bathroom stalls lined up against the far wall. Really over the top for a bathroom...but I enjoyed it.
Anyways we had great conversation reminiscing about High School (Me, PR Boy and CNN Boy all went to the same school) and UF life. It was great for all of us to get together in one place because we haven't been since early this year. As we were slowly getting sloshed, we started making plans for later in the evening. Originally, we had planned to go meet up with some people at Cielo over in Meatpacking District but I changed my mind seeing as tho some of the girls who were supposed to come out with us ended up changing their plans at the last minute. Since 2 more of my boys were gonna meet up later that night....there is no way that all 6 guys could get thru the door at that place. I didn't reserve a table or anything....so I said fuck it....there is no way I am gonna deal with door drama on my birthday.
Luckly, PR Boy was familiar this bar called PDT (short for Please Don't Tell). Some of his co-workers discovered it earlier this year and they have been going ever since. He swears by their drinks so I told him to call em up at make a reservation for us later in the night. We ended up getting a booth in the back for all of us and we basically had a great time minus one little problem. PR Boy's friend from London got into a bit of an altercation with this one bitch who passed by our booth. Clearly she was drunk and she said something stupid like "ohh look at all these dicks in a booth......you must be faggots.....where are the chicks?" LOL! So, London Boy turns around and was like "bitch...we were just here waiting for your fat ass" to which the drunk chick dropped her drink on his head. Not to take this lightly, London Boy picked up his Whiskey Sour and splashed it in her face. As she was trying to get out of the way....she kinda slipped and fell into the backdoor....landing on her ass in the smoking patio.
**This is not her picture....but it gives you a pretty good idea**
I know it is wrong....but me and CNN Boy could not stop laughing! LMAO! Dumb slut.....you come to insult a table of guys just trying to have a good time....and you find yourself on your ass outside with Whiskey on your face....HAHA! I started laughing even harder when I realized that there was actually 2 gay guys (or maybe 1 1/2) sitting in the booth.....so her observation wasn't totally off. Too bad she picked the wrong dude to mess with......
Anywho...we stayed there until about 3....racked up a CRAZY tab...but oh well....it's my party and i'll get pissy if I wanna...HAHA! Overall, that night was really fun...I have no complaints. Let's get on to Saturday now....
Unfortunately I had to work on Saturday...luckly my shift didn't start until 2...so I had time to recover in the morning. While fixing up some of the tables in the front of the store...I saw a HUGE commotion on the street....cameras flashing...people running....blah blah. Of course, me being me....I wanted to see what was going on. So I left the table a moved to the window....scooting the security guard out of the way...LOL.
And lookie there....if it isn't Jessica Simpson walking down the street with 5 ginormous 300+ pound linebackers guarding her and pushing people out of the way.
(P.S. I did not take this picture....in fact I didn't take any of her since I was working and we are not allowed to have cell phones on the floor...but I just think this image captures everything we know and love about Jess...HAHA! I mean, who wears heals and then walks on subway grates? As if that is is a good idea.)
Anyways....my co-worker came up behind me to ask me what was going on. I pointed and told her it was Jessica Simpson. She looked at me and scoffed....
"K please....she is around here all the time....all that bitch does is shop....it isn't even that big of a deal....we see celebs all the time....we saw Rhianna like 3 weeks ago"
Well excuse me ho for not being as jaded as you. LOL! I mean if Jessica Simpson walks across street in front of my store....should I not even notice? Just the way this girl said it was so bitchy....it really turned me off. I mean I'm not gonna sit there and gawk...because I have work to do....but she acted as if this is 'such and everyday occurrence' that it would be foolish to even acknowledge it. Needless to say I hope I don't get scheduled with her anymore....I don't want her 'tude rubbing off on me.
While we are on the subject of work, allow me to go off on a couple of tangents....
#1: Pete was totally right about retail being the gayest profession of life. Literally...the only straight man in the store is the store manager. All the guys who work the floor.....that I have been scheduled with....are gay....I kid you not. Not like Chris Crocker flamy, bitchy, queeny gay......but gay as in they like to talk about their boyfriends and who is cute in the store....etc etc etc.
It is totally bizarre.
Bizarre in the fact that I am not used to being surrounded by people who are so open and comfortable with their sexuality. I kinda like it actually...it is refreshing. Surprisingly, no one asked about my 'status' yet...I figure it is either due to me being new or the fact that they probably already know and are just waiting for me to say something...haha. Either way it is all good...whatever.
#2: Looks like all the running and exercise that I have been doing this semester is paying off. Your boy K is the proud owner of a size 30 waist {and everyone claps}. How do I know this? Because I was given clothes to wear at work and the waists are all 30's. At first I was totally skeptical because one stores sizes might run large while another's might run a bit snug....but after independently verifying it at Abercrombie, Zara, French Connection, AE and Banana.....I am reasonably confident that I am now a skinny bitch. Even my family members commented on how different I look. My Mom in particular cussed me out because she said that there is no way I could be eating right up there in NYC. HAHA...oh Momz...you're too cute.....but really, I am eating quite well so there is nothing to worry about.
However, I do not need to loose any more weight! anything smaller than a 30 waist on my body type would just look ridiculously out of proportion and sickly. If I loose anymore...I run the risk of looking like a real life Starvin Marvin IMO...
LMAO....anyways back to my weekend....
After work on Saturday, I met up with Rocket Scientist and his friends from Southern Cali for some Mexican. We ate at this really great place on Lexington....but the name escapes me for some reason. Anyways, great food and drinks and even better company. Sat across from this guy who is the official aide to Sen. Lautenberg from NJ. A really cool, interesting kid (and he is a graduate of your Alma Mater Erik!) and we had a lot to talk about. Sadly I am 100% sure that he is straight...but oh well...intellectually stimulating convos over tacos and Mojitos are always fun...even if you don't plan on sleeping with the guy afterwards...hahaha!
We had a huge table at dinner and it was hard to meet all of Rocket Scientist's friends but I got a chance to mingle with them afterwards when we went to this bar called the Flatiron Lounge. I had not been there previously and I was pretty impressed with space...but not so much with the crowd seeing as tho I am pretty sure that we were among the youngest in the place. Oh well...I got to chat with some interesting people that Rocket Scientist has known forever. This one girl (we will call her Penthouse Girl for reasons explained in the future) was really cool and we hit it off almost immediately. She has a really bubbly personality and almost reminds me of a WASPy version of Columbia Girl....haha! Another potential fag hag.....who knows? HAHA! Her friend was also really cool....I am gonna call her Penn Spice because she went to Penn and she looks like Victoria Beckham. (P.S. I love this whole anonymous naming scheme everyone has adopted for blogs.....isn't it fun....you can call ppl whatever you want!)
Anyways, we drank there a little and chatted...it was a fun time, but it was getting late and we were all hungry. You know what happens when you combine late nights and 8 drunk young people......NO not an orgy silly.....it's Diner Time! We all stumbled into this random 24 hr Diner and ordered the craziest mish-mash of food. Sausage, Ice Cream, Chocolate Cake, Waffles, Grilled Cheese...etc etc.....the waiter looked at all of us like we were crazy. Haha....could you blame him?
We had some cool convos at the table while eating. Penthouse Girl, Penn Spice and the other guys that we were with all went to Penn so they started telling me and Rocket Scientist about the crazy things that went on during their undergrad years. I will not get into everything that was said...but definitely know that a lot of the stuff left me on the floor.
Also found out that one of the guys that we were with played 2nd base on their baseball team and almost went to the majors but decided to do I. Banking instead. What a shift?!?! And he was so modest about it...Penthouse Girl kept on running off his stats and whatnot and he was seriously blushing in the corner of the booth. It was so cute. And can I just say...physically.....the guy was really hot. Imagine like a 6'5, 180p Adam Brody....and you basically have a good description of this kid. And he had THE BIGGEST HANDS I have ever seen on anyone in my life. Seriously.....they were huge. And let me also say......I never really thought much about hands...or really noticed them before...but dare I say his hands were hot? LOL! Imagine those palming your ass....................
I digress.
So after the diner we decided to go back to Penthouse Girls apartment to play Guitar Hero III. Apparently this was the thing to do in Philly...because I had never heard about it before that night. Anyways...we were told that it would be a crazy fun experience so Rocket Scientist and I tagged along to check it out.
OMG THIS GIRLS APARTMENT....
Words cannot express....the shit was B-A-N-A-N-A-S!
It is somewhere either in Midtown or Murray Hill....I don't know the cutoff...but it is seriously the penthouse suite of this building. She has a doorman and everything! And the view!!!! You can see the Chrysler Building and Grand Central from her floor to celling windows. It is ridiculous....and she just graduated! I was curious....and even tho I know it was classless I had to ask her how much all this is costing her......
$3000....JUST FOR HER HALF!!!!!!!
AND HER PARENTS ARE PAYING FOR IT!
I need to get you pregnant girl!!!
J/K J/K J/K {or am I?}
Anyways...we had fun playing Guitar Hero....if anyone has a Wii and doesn't have that game yet...you seriously need to pick that shit up. There are few things in life funnier than seeing a bunch of drunk people trying to stay on beat with a plastic guitar.....rocking out and knocking over furniture. HAHA!
We were playing that for maybe an hour and then Penthouse Girl's roommate came back with all her friends from Porky's. Now it was really a house party because there were about 20-25 people there. Everyone was taking shots and shooting the shit....just having a good time. I met Penthouse Girl's roommate who 'seemed' to be a cool and upright girl....but she and her friends did something later in the night that was just despicable that I just refuse to talk about on my blog. Needless to say that Penthouse Girl needs to kick that bitch out and get another roommate because she is a bad seed with trashy friends that will just bring her down.
Anyways, Me, Rocket Scientist, Penthouse Girl and Penn Spice were up in PG's room passed out on the floor having 'deep, stimulating conversations' about everything and nothing at the same time. You know, those talks that you have with your friends at 4AM in the morning when you are all so gone but yet you still believe you have something smart and profound to say...haha! Yea, we were having one of those and we ended up all passing out. I remember waking up later in the night and moving over to the pull out couch in the living room with Penn Spice and I think Rocket Scientist got up into Penthouse Girls bed....but I can't say anything happened between them, but you KNOW nothing happen b/t me and Penn Spice....seeing as tho she lacks the necessary equipment to make me happy...LMAO...but all and all....it was a pleasant ending to a fun night and a fun weekend in general.
Here is to a new year for me...hopefully on my 24th I will be celebrating with my boyfriend and be pretty much out.....you never know crazier things have happened!
Haha..it's not really. I have no cruising stories or coming out stories....just good, clean fun over my birthday weekend. I got a chance to meet some really cool people, hang at some cool places and overall....I had a great time. Let's start on Friday....
Rocket Scientist came in late the previous night so we woke up late a did a bit of shopping around town. It was fun to hang with him again because we always have such a great time together. Our sense of humor is really quite similar so we end up putting each other in stitches whenever we are together. We bought some new threads for the weekend festivities and met up with some mutual friends who were working around the city.
For dinner...me, Rocket Scientist, CNN Boy and PR Boy hit up this really amazing restaurant called SAPA in Midtown (or I guess it is more of the Flatiron District...I dunno....it is never clear cut) I guess the food could be categorized as Asian Fusion.....who knows....all I know it was AMAZING. The drinks were delicious and I was sipping on Cosmojito's the entire night. You think that is a gay enough drink? HAHAHA! Rocket Scientist made fun of me for ordering such a "fruity cocktail" until he had a sip and got one for himself. HYPOCRITE! You know that shit was off the chain!
As good as the food and drinks were.....the space is really the main draw of the entire restaurant. I think it is an old, converted warehouse of some sort because the ceilings were incredibly high. There were candles everywhere and all the decorations/funiture really worked together to make a great atmosphere IMO. It is definitely a great restaurant to impress a date....haha.
And the bathrooms are fucking ridiculous.....there is like a wading pool in the middle of the floor with 'cabana like' bathroom stalls lined up against the far wall. Really over the top for a bathroom...but I enjoyed it.
Anyways we had great conversation reminiscing about High School (Me, PR Boy and CNN Boy all went to the same school) and UF life. It was great for all of us to get together in one place because we haven't been since early this year. As we were slowly getting sloshed, we started making plans for later in the evening. Originally, we had planned to go meet up with some people at Cielo over in Meatpacking District but I changed my mind seeing as tho some of the girls who were supposed to come out with us ended up changing their plans at the last minute. Since 2 more of my boys were gonna meet up later that night....there is no way that all 6 guys could get thru the door at that place. I didn't reserve a table or anything....so I said fuck it....there is no way I am gonna deal with door drama on my birthday.
Luckly, PR Boy was familiar this bar called PDT (short for Please Don't Tell). Some of his co-workers discovered it earlier this year and they have been going ever since. He swears by their drinks so I told him to call em up at make a reservation for us later in the night. We ended up getting a booth in the back for all of us and we basically had a great time minus one little problem. PR Boy's friend from London got into a bit of an altercation with this one bitch who passed by our booth. Clearly she was drunk and she said something stupid like "ohh look at all these dicks in a booth......you must be faggots.....where are the chicks?" LOL! So, London Boy turns around and was like "bitch...we were just here waiting for your fat ass" to which the drunk chick dropped her drink on his head. Not to take this lightly, London Boy picked up his Whiskey Sour and splashed it in her face. As she was trying to get out of the way....she kinda slipped and fell into the backdoor....landing on her ass in the smoking patio.
**This is not her picture....but it gives you a pretty good idea**
I know it is wrong....but me and CNN Boy could not stop laughing! LMAO! Dumb slut.....you come to insult a table of guys just trying to have a good time....and you find yourself on your ass outside with Whiskey on your face....HAHA! I started laughing even harder when I realized that there was actually 2 gay guys (or maybe 1 1/2) sitting in the booth.....so her observation wasn't totally off. Too bad she picked the wrong dude to mess with......
Anywho...we stayed there until about 3....racked up a CRAZY tab...but oh well....it's my party and i'll get pissy if I wanna...HAHA! Overall, that night was really fun...I have no complaints. Let's get on to Saturday now....
Unfortunately I had to work on Saturday...luckly my shift didn't start until 2...so I had time to recover in the morning. While fixing up some of the tables in the front of the store...I saw a HUGE commotion on the street....cameras flashing...people running....blah blah. Of course, me being me....I wanted to see what was going on. So I left the table a moved to the window....scooting the security guard out of the way...LOL.
And lookie there....if it isn't Jessica Simpson walking down the street with 5 ginormous 300+ pound linebackers guarding her and pushing people out of the way.
(P.S. I did not take this picture....in fact I didn't take any of her since I was working and we are not allowed to have cell phones on the floor...but I just think this image captures everything we know and love about Jess...HAHA! I mean, who wears heals and then walks on subway grates? As if that is is a good idea.)
Anyways....my co-worker came up behind me to ask me what was going on. I pointed and told her it was Jessica Simpson. She looked at me and scoffed....
"K please....she is around here all the time....all that bitch does is shop....it isn't even that big of a deal....we see celebs all the time....we saw Rhianna like 3 weeks ago"
Well excuse me ho for not being as jaded as you. LOL! I mean if Jessica Simpson walks across street in front of my store....should I not even notice? Just the way this girl said it was so bitchy....it really turned me off. I mean I'm not gonna sit there and gawk...because I have work to do....but she acted as if this is 'such and everyday occurrence' that it would be foolish to even acknowledge it. Needless to say I hope I don't get scheduled with her anymore....I don't want her 'tude rubbing off on me.
While we are on the subject of work, allow me to go off on a couple of tangents....
#1: Pete was totally right about retail being the gayest profession of life. Literally...the only straight man in the store is the store manager. All the guys who work the floor.....that I have been scheduled with....are gay....I kid you not. Not like Chris Crocker flamy, bitchy, queeny gay......but gay as in they like to talk about their boyfriends and who is cute in the store....etc etc etc.
It is totally bizarre.
Bizarre in the fact that I am not used to being surrounded by people who are so open and comfortable with their sexuality. I kinda like it actually...it is refreshing. Surprisingly, no one asked about my 'status' yet...I figure it is either due to me being new or the fact that they probably already know and are just waiting for me to say something...haha. Either way it is all good...whatever.
#2: Looks like all the running and exercise that I have been doing this semester is paying off. Your boy K is the proud owner of a size 30 waist {and everyone claps}. How do I know this? Because I was given clothes to wear at work and the waists are all 30's. At first I was totally skeptical because one stores sizes might run large while another's might run a bit snug....but after independently verifying it at Abercrombie, Zara, French Connection, AE and Banana.....I am reasonably confident that I am now a skinny bitch. Even my family members commented on how different I look. My Mom in particular cussed me out because she said that there is no way I could be eating right up there in NYC. HAHA...oh Momz...you're too cute.....but really, I am eating quite well so there is nothing to worry about.
However, I do not need to loose any more weight! anything smaller than a 30 waist on my body type would just look ridiculously out of proportion and sickly. If I loose anymore...I run the risk of looking like a real life Starvin Marvin IMO...
LMAO....anyways back to my weekend....
After work on Saturday, I met up with Rocket Scientist and his friends from Southern Cali for some Mexican. We ate at this really great place on Lexington....but the name escapes me for some reason. Anyways, great food and drinks and even better company. Sat across from this guy who is the official aide to Sen. Lautenberg from NJ. A really cool, interesting kid (and he is a graduate of your Alma Mater Erik!) and we had a lot to talk about. Sadly I am 100% sure that he is straight...but oh well...intellectually stimulating convos over tacos and Mojitos are always fun...even if you don't plan on sleeping with the guy afterwards...hahaha!
We had a huge table at dinner and it was hard to meet all of Rocket Scientist's friends but I got a chance to mingle with them afterwards when we went to this bar called the Flatiron Lounge. I had not been there previously and I was pretty impressed with space...but not so much with the crowd seeing as tho I am pretty sure that we were among the youngest in the place. Oh well...I got to chat with some interesting people that Rocket Scientist has known forever. This one girl (we will call her Penthouse Girl for reasons explained in the future) was really cool and we hit it off almost immediately. She has a really bubbly personality and almost reminds me of a WASPy version of Columbia Girl....haha! Another potential fag hag.....who knows? HAHA! Her friend was also really cool....I am gonna call her Penn Spice because she went to Penn and she looks like Victoria Beckham. (P.S. I love this whole anonymous naming scheme everyone has adopted for blogs.....isn't it fun....you can call ppl whatever you want!)
Anyways, we drank there a little and chatted...it was a fun time, but it was getting late and we were all hungry. You know what happens when you combine late nights and 8 drunk young people......NO not an orgy silly.....it's Diner Time! We all stumbled into this random 24 hr Diner and ordered the craziest mish-mash of food. Sausage, Ice Cream, Chocolate Cake, Waffles, Grilled Cheese...etc etc.....the waiter looked at all of us like we were crazy. Haha....could you blame him?
We had some cool convos at the table while eating. Penthouse Girl, Penn Spice and the other guys that we were with all went to Penn so they started telling me and Rocket Scientist about the crazy things that went on during their undergrad years. I will not get into everything that was said...but definitely know that a lot of the stuff left me on the floor.
Also found out that one of the guys that we were with played 2nd base on their baseball team and almost went to the majors but decided to do I. Banking instead. What a shift?!?! And he was so modest about it...Penthouse Girl kept on running off his stats and whatnot and he was seriously blushing in the corner of the booth. It was so cute. And can I just say...physically.....the guy was really hot. Imagine like a 6'5, 180p Adam Brody....and you basically have a good description of this kid. And he had THE BIGGEST HANDS I have ever seen on anyone in my life. Seriously.....they were huge. And let me also say......I never really thought much about hands...or really noticed them before...but dare I say his hands were hot? LOL! Imagine those palming your ass....................
I digress.
So after the diner we decided to go back to Penthouse Girls apartment to play Guitar Hero III. Apparently this was the thing to do in Philly...because I had never heard about it before that night. Anyways...we were told that it would be a crazy fun experience so Rocket Scientist and I tagged along to check it out.
OMG THIS GIRLS APARTMENT....
Words cannot express....the shit was B-A-N-A-N-A-S!
It is somewhere either in Midtown or Murray Hill....I don't know the cutoff...but it is seriously the penthouse suite of this building. She has a doorman and everything! And the view!!!! You can see the Chrysler Building and Grand Central from her floor to celling windows. It is ridiculous....and she just graduated! I was curious....and even tho I know it was classless I had to ask her how much all this is costing her......
$3000....JUST FOR HER HALF!!!!!!!
AND HER PARENTS ARE PAYING FOR IT!
I need to get you pregnant girl!!!
J/K J/K J/K {or am I?}
Anyways...we had fun playing Guitar Hero....if anyone has a Wii and doesn't have that game yet...you seriously need to pick that shit up. There are few things in life funnier than seeing a bunch of drunk people trying to stay on beat with a plastic guitar.....rocking out and knocking over furniture. HAHA!
We were playing that for maybe an hour and then Penthouse Girl's roommate came back with all her friends from Porky's. Now it was really a house party because there were about 20-25 people there. Everyone was taking shots and shooting the shit....just having a good time. I met Penthouse Girl's roommate who 'seemed' to be a cool and upright girl....but she and her friends did something later in the night that was just despicable that I just refuse to talk about on my blog. Needless to say that Penthouse Girl needs to kick that bitch out and get another roommate because she is a bad seed with trashy friends that will just bring her down.
Anyways, Me, Rocket Scientist, Penthouse Girl and Penn Spice were up in PG's room passed out on the floor having 'deep, stimulating conversations' about everything and nothing at the same time. You know, those talks that you have with your friends at 4AM in the morning when you are all so gone but yet you still believe you have something smart and profound to say...haha! Yea, we were having one of those and we ended up all passing out. I remember waking up later in the night and moving over to the pull out couch in the living room with Penn Spice and I think Rocket Scientist got up into Penthouse Girls bed....but I can't say anything happened between them, but you KNOW nothing happen b/t me and Penn Spice....seeing as tho she lacks the necessary equipment to make me happy...LMAO...but all and all....it was a pleasant ending to a fun night and a fun weekend in general.
Here is to a new year for me...hopefully on my 24th I will be celebrating with my boyfriend and be pretty much out.....you never know crazier things have happened!
Monday, November 5, 2007
Jesus....What A Hot Mess!
Trust me....it is WORTH the 4+ minutes if you haven't seen it yet.
Amy....homegirl......you need some help. I love you to pieces....but you just have to do better! You cannot be at an awards show...or anywhere for that matter.....singing like any lil' drunk, homeless lady you would see in a subway station or park! I swear to you that I did not understand one word in that entire clip.....
NOT ONE!
Im not gonna lie.....I was laughing hard tho that the background singers and the band can keep it together and focus thru all that. And ppl talk about Britney being a hot mess......LOL!
Anyways...just thought I would share that little clip. On a more interesting note, I had a great birthday weekend and I am working on compiling everything that went down since Friday. Definitely good times and some interesting stories.....stay tuned and have a great week!
**EDIT: So Justin brought it to my attn that they took the video down...which is a shame for the people who didnt see it because it is basically the saddest/funniest thing i've seen in months. However, since we ARE dealing with the train-wreck that is Amy Winehouse you know there is absolutely no shortage of drunkass performances
Here is one of my favorites from the Charlotte Church show where they cover 'Beat It'. Obviously there is no one in this woman's life that loves her enough to get her some help. I mean really...somebody help this chick!
And poor Charlotte....she is totally give her 'the look' during the whole performance like.....
"I know this bitch did not come out on my stage like this...oh hell no!"
Amy....homegirl......you need some help. I love you to pieces....but you just have to do better! You cannot be at an awards show...or anywhere for that matter.....singing like any lil' drunk, homeless lady you would see in a subway station or park! I swear to you that I did not understand one word in that entire clip.....
NOT ONE!
Im not gonna lie.....I was laughing hard tho that the background singers and the band can keep it together and focus thru all that. And ppl talk about Britney being a hot mess......LOL!
Anyways...just thought I would share that little clip. On a more interesting note, I had a great birthday weekend and I am working on compiling everything that went down since Friday. Definitely good times and some interesting stories.....stay tuned and have a great week!
**EDIT: So Justin brought it to my attn that they took the video down...which is a shame for the people who didnt see it because it is basically the saddest/funniest thing i've seen in months. However, since we ARE dealing with the train-wreck that is Amy Winehouse you know there is absolutely no shortage of drunkass performances
Here is one of my favorites from the Charlotte Church show where they cover 'Beat It'. Obviously there is no one in this woman's life that loves her enough to get her some help. I mean really...somebody help this chick!
And poor Charlotte....she is totally give her 'the look' during the whole performance like.....
"I know this bitch did not come out on my stage like this...oh hell no!"
Thursday, November 1, 2007
So I Am Out......
LOL!
Well that wasn't as bad as I thought it would be at all.
So Columbia Girl and I went out to the Village Halloween Parade. A lot of very creative people out there in the world I must say. My favorite was the drunk Britney Spears drag queen who wore her VMA's outfit with a bag of cheetos in one hand and then two naked cabbage patch dolls on ropes in the other. She/He would walk a couple of feet and then drop the babies on the floor and then bust into a drunk dance move then stumble.....I thought I would pass out from the laughter!
There were also this group of Asian kids who went as Tetris blocks and they all fit together......sooooo cute. HAHA!
Anyways.....I enjoyed myself even tho we got there really late and couldn't get a good spot to see everything. Whatever...I had bigger things on my mind most of the night. Before I left my place I was on the phone with VJ psyching myself out.....clearly it worked.
After the parade we hit up the Pita Grill for something quick and healthy to eat. I honestly don't even remember much of what we were talking about before I dropped the bomb. All I knew was that this was the time....I had her alone....it was a quiet, chill place.....and everyone was in a positive mood. Here's how it went down.......
Columbia Girl: {Drinking Soup}
Me: Ahhhhhhh
Columbia Girl: What's Up?
Me: Ummmm Well..... {stares blankly at her}
Columbia Girl: Haha, what is it K? You should see your face....
Me: I have something to say to you
Columbia Girl: WHAT?!?! Sheesshhh {giggles}
Me: {stares}
Columbia Girl: Ok K......stop it now....you are starting to scare me....seriously!
Me: Sigh....
Columbia Girl: OMG it is something bad isn't it.......are you sick?
Me: Oh God no...na na na.....
Columbia Girl: Is it your parents....are they ok?!?! TELL ME...IM NERVOUS!
Me: I'm Gay........
Me: Yea....so......yea
Columbia Girl: Wait, wait, wait, wait {whips hands in the air} WHAT!?!
Me: You heard right....
Columbia Girl: OMG I CANT TELL IF YOUR SERIOUS RIGHT NOW...YOU JUST SAID IT SO DEADPAN....ARE YOU SERIOUS?
Me: Yes
Columbia Girl: OMG, OMG...You DID NOT just say you like boys right now! {statement}
Me: Ummm, well I prefer men....but yea.....
Columbia Girl: {rolls eyes and claps hands over soup....leans in} OMG....since when?!?!
Me: Uh....1984?
Columbia Girl {rolls eyes exaggeratedly} K...stop playing!
Me: Haha....well yea, I've always known
Columbia Girl: O-M-G....
Me: You mean to tell me you had no idea?
Me: Columbia Girl?????
Columbia Girl: STUPID!
Me: Wait....what?
Columbia Girl: AND THIS WHOLE FUCKING TIME I JUST THOUGHT YOU WERE JUST REALLY METROSEXUAL......OMG WHO ELSE IS GAY!?!?!
Me: LMAO
Columbia Girl: HAHAHAHA
Me: So like.....this is a complete shock?
Columbia Girl: Well yea.....I mean....don't get me wrong....I'm totally OK with it....it doesn't change who you are to me...you still K....BUT O-M-G!!!!
Me: LOL, and here I am thinking that I haven't been fooling anyone...
Columbia Girl {scoffs} Ummm yea....well not so much!
Me: HAHA
Columbia Girl: So wait.....Am I the first one?
Me: Yea I figured out of all my friends...you would take it the best....I mean I was still scared shitless...but I figured that you would be supportive....and really....you are the only one that I can see myself talking to about this.
Columbia Girl: OMG....IM HONORED! {clutches pearls and gasps}
Aside #1: So yea.....those of you who read my blog regularly will realize that this last statement wasn't the "total" truth. I mean, PR Boy and Delta Boy already pretty much know I am gay...but I am not categorizing those situations. For me, this is the first time I really sat someone down and came out on my own accord, emphatically and absolutely.
Me: I trust you not to say anything to anyone else.....I know I really don't have to say that to you..but yea.....I am not ready to come out yet totally.
Columbia Girl: Oh....I totally understand....there is no way I would say anything...please take your time....this is a HUGGEEE STEP...MY GOD!
Me: Yea it is
Columbia Girl: You know tho K.....all our friends....if you talked to them....it wouldn't matter...they are all really smart and open, liberal....
Me: Yea
Columbia Girl: They wouldn't care.....please...it wouldn't phase them at all
Me: Im still not ready
Columbia Girl: Oh I know, I know....but just so you can sleep a little easier....OMG you must feel like a huge weight has been lifted??!?!!
Me: I'm still kinda in shock actually.....let me have everything settle first
Columbia Girl: YOU IN SHOCK!!!!!!
Me: HAHA....sorry
Columbia Girl: Jesus......how did you not have a breakdown yet.....I can't imagine you keeping this in for so long
Me: Yea, I've broken down many times.....but in private......I am very good at putting what I want out there.....you remember how I always use the expression 'smoke and mirrors' and everyone thinks it is a cute lil' joke.....
Columbia Girl: LMAO....NO WONDER
Me: Yea
Columbia Girl: Wow, who knew when I left my apartment this evening....the parade would be the LEAST exciting part of the night?!?!?!
Me: Yea
Columbia Girl: I'm so happy for you....OMG.....you're like......just starting your life for real now...HOW EXCITING!
Me: Yea...and scary
Columbia Girl: Oh....of course, of course.....so like.....have you been out yet?
Me: Not really
Columbia Girl: Are you even ready for that? Or do you need to settle first?
Me: I mean...I've been out to some bars....but nothing really serious....I dunno if it is totally my scene yet...we will have to see.
Columbia Girl: Oh, I totally understand....ohhhh man.....you're gonna have so much FUN! You are in NEW YORK of all places!
Me: That is 1/2 the reason I came actually.....
Columbia Girl: NO WONDER! Geeze K......in hindsight I feel so silly....because I should have known...but like....since it isn't a big deal for me either which way...I guess I never really connected the dots
Me: Yea...Like.....you have known me for like 7 years now......have you ever seen me with a girl?
Columbia Girl: YOU SEEEEE.....Shit like that.....I shoulda picked up on....HAHAHA
Me: LOL...I forgive you
Columbia Girl: Hahaha....
Anyways....that is basically the gist of it. We stayed for about 2 hours just talking about random stuff....who would take it well, who probably wouldn't.....what is the best way to come out to the parents in the FAR distant future....etc etc etc. Overall a really good talk, nothing has changed....I met her for lunch today and it was like nothing happened last night at all. Basically, it is what everyone who is out now has been saying to me...once people find out.....they will be kinda shocked at first....but then it is like whatever...business as usual. That is comforting....although the situation is MUCH different with parents!!!
I don't even want to think about that right now....baby steps guys....baby steps!
Now, if you would excuse me....I've got to head out to LGA to get Rocket Scientist so we can get pissy and belligerent tonight....haha! Have a good one!
Ohhhh and Happy Early Birthday Pete!!! You old dog you....have fun tonight and tomorrow!
And Just Like That.........I Am Out!!!!
What an eventful night....and I'm not even talking about the Village Parade!
If the point of Halloween is to scare/shock people, I definitely accomplished my goal....HAHA!
I came out to Columbia Girl tonight.....and it threw her for a loop....but she ended up taking it amazingly well. I still cannot believe I did it, but really......it's time. Anyways I just got home and it is like 2:30 and I have my first day of work in like 6 hours so I'm gonna go to sleep. Funny transcript coming up later today.
Ohhhhh, and Rocket Scientist is coming into town this afternoon for my B-Day. Fun Times!
I might even come out to him to......balls to the wall boys!
If the point of Halloween is to scare/shock people, I definitely accomplished my goal....HAHA!
I came out to Columbia Girl tonight.....and it threw her for a loop....but she ended up taking it amazingly well. I still cannot believe I did it, but really......it's time. Anyways I just got home and it is like 2:30 and I have my first day of work in like 6 hours so I'm gonna go to sleep. Funny transcript coming up later today.
Ohhhhh, and Rocket Scientist is coming into town this afternoon for my B-Day. Fun Times!
I might even come out to him to......balls to the wall boys!
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