Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Exciting Days Ahead!

This post really has no point other than to say that im TOTES excited for the events coming up within the next week...

We've got...

- Halloween
- Florida/Georgia Game
- My Birthday




If my birthday wishes come through, Florida will have de-stroyed Georgia, my first "out" birthday will have been a success and Barack Obama will be the 44th President of the US!

(I would also ask for a really cute boy in there somewhere but I don't want to get to greedy LOL!)

Saturday, October 25, 2008

Should I Give Up My iPhone?

So I love love love my iPhone...but lets be serious, it is becoming kinda ubiquitous no?

It seems like everyone has one now, and while this is great news for my AAPL shares, it kinda sucks the individuality right out of me...haha!

Hence why I got super-duper excited when I heard about this brand new baby....

The AURA features the world’s first circular display with 16 million colors and 300 dpi resolution.

The display is covered with Grade 1, 62-carat sapphire crystal lens, one of the most scratch-resistant materials on earth, and the housing is crafted from stainless steel that is electro- and hand polished, chemically etched, and PVD coated. The handset has an assisted-opening blade that is comprised of a Swiss-made, custom-engineered rotating mechanism with 130 precision ball bearings and custom Tungsten Carbide Coated Gears.

To separate the phone from the full, we should tell you that the AURA sports quad-Band GSM 850/900/1800/1900, EDGE, a 2 MP Fixed Focus camera, Bluetooth 2.0 + EDR with A2DP, text and email messaging, multimedia playback, and a yet to be named open source browser. It is expected to launch worldwide at the beginning of Q4 2008.

So the specs are super-duper whack but listen, it is sooo pretty HAHA!

Just like I like my men, beautiful with no substance....


But seriously, this phone reminds me of the Motorola V70 I used to have back in like 03. Back in the day, that shit was a showstopper! I mean at that point, no other phone on the market had a rotating bezel. Then I traded up to the V80 that had the rotating faceplate and crazy rhythm lights that responded to whatever sounds were in the environment. HA! I was young and dumb...and I thought that 'ish was so fresh! LOL!

Fast forward to 08...and you can see that this phone isn't really that impressive at all....

And then I come to find out that it's gonna cost $1,999 at launch....


For that kinda money, that phone better give me one touch dialing to Jesus himself!

Can you hear me now?

We Came To A Conclusion....

So I was chatting with homegirl the other night in the subway station and while looking at some of the advertisements we had an epiphany....


Now bear with me as I try to explain....

I think that I've discussed my mild fascination with him on the blog before, but the subject deserves a major revisit seeing as tho the new Bond film comes out in like 3 weeks...

You see, the guy isn't conventionally attractive at all.

I mean, he has beady eyes, huge ears, a rough complexion among other things....

But for some inexplicable reason he is still so fuckin gorgeous...

What is it?

Is it the fact that he is British?

Is it his persona?

His body?

Oooooo maybe it is his body! LMAO!!!

No really though, it isn't just that....he just has something about him. I cannot even hope to explain it.

In any case, November 14th cannot come fast enough...I am gonna be THE FIRST person in that theater to watch Quantum of Solace. I am sooo excited!

I hope they put his sexy ass in some more square-cut bathing suits...mmmhmmmmmphf!

*claps furiously*

Friday, October 24, 2008

Funny Stories...

So a couple of funny/interesting things happened to me this afternoon. I figured I would share...indulge please me.

I had an hour break from work today so I figured I'd do what any other young, bored and semi-fashionable gay guy in NYC would do.......annnddd I went shopping. For those of you who know me IRL, you know that this is most certainly NOT a shock...LOL!

Anyway, so I'm on Bleecker in W. Village heading to my future husband/sugar daddies' store (Marc Jacobs) to check out some of his new stuff and I see this odd silhouette in front of me. His back was to me and I could tell that he had a pretty nice body for someone his age.....super tall, tapered waist, broad shoulders etc, etc.

I say "someone his age" because is most identifiable characteristic was his hair.


I actually think that is what drew my eyes in the first place because I have never in my life seen someone with that shade of hair!

I'm talking about just straight up white, no gray at all....and it was FULL TOO...no scalp!

So naturally I was kinda intrigued because for whatever reason in my mind, that body just didn't match with that head of hair. I know this sounds silly, but you never associate such an athletic body with old man hair....but I digress

So I walked a bit faster so I could catch up to "Mr. White" and see if the front matched the back....

Y'all are NOT gonna believe who it was.....

I'll have you know that it was MOTHERFUCKIN' TED DANSON!!!!!!

Dead serious!

I chuckled at myself for getting excited over Ted Danson LMFAO....but for real, he looks really good from the back. He is a handsome man for sure.....don't laugh at me I SWEAR to you I don't have an old man fetish!


(He does have a really nice ass though....)



Ok next funny story......

So since I was in the neighborhood I figured I'd run over to Y-3 in Meatpacking and see if they had any hot new stuff. Last time I was there they had this sick pair of sneakers but they were totally sold out of my size and they couldn't locate them anywhere. Boooooo

Anywho, so there is that park on the corner of 8th and Bleecker right? Well, I used to love that park but now I hate it because it is associated with the train-wreck that is Ryan. I know it is really cheesy but on our first date (after dinner) we had Magnolia cupcakes on a bench in that park. It had just finished raining so he thought it would be cute to take off his rainjacket and spread it on the bench so we wouldn't get wet...


How ridiculously maudlin..UGHHHHH

In what world did I ever think that was cute?????

Don't answer that, back to the story......

So I guess I was looking at the park and reminiscing about old times when I noticed this woman and her giant dog in my line of sight. It looked like a St. Bernard or something....just ridiculously big, and of course this woman was all of 5 feet 2 inches. Honestly, what possess someone to own such a large dog in the city? Where is that bitch supposed to play?

Anyway, I quickly found out the answer to that question........

So I was looking at the dog from the side and when I first spotted it was stationary. As I walked closer to 8th Ave, I guess it heard me coming and turned around......

Do you know this was a THREE-LEGGED DOG?!?!?!


Now listen, my first inclination was too giggle but I quickly stopped myself because I realized that this was horribly insensitive.

But then this ol' heffa shot me the death stare like "bitch, who the fuck do you think you are laughing at my dog?!?!?"

Um, ma'am lets be real for a second mmmkay?

You've got a three-legged St. Bernard.......

And you're walking it in the city.....

And it is hopping around....

And you HONESTLY EXPECT people not to have some sort of reaction to that?

Granted, it wasn't the most ideal reaction, but you just to realize that such things come with the territory. For what is worth, I apologize......

Now go run along and play catch with your dog


Thursday, October 16, 2008


Can you imagine people like this still exist?

"If Obama wins....the blacks will take over?"

"I don't like the fact that he thinks us white people are trash.."



Unfortunately I did not get the memo that black people were taking over. If anyone out there got it, please forward it to me STAT...

You know, I don't want to get left behind when the rest of my "negro brethren" take over the country.

I wonder what Obama will put me in charge of?

You Know What....You're Right Sen. McCain....

Because that is EXACTLY how I felt after I watched your digusting, mean spirited performance last night.....

As old ladies from the South would say....

"Bless your heart baby...it'll all be over soon mmmkay?"

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

I Made A Bet With Justin Today...

I don't think he thought I was serious when I said I was gonna blog about this but I am nothing but a man of my word!

So everyone is familiar with my dear friend Justin right?

Well today on AIM I made him a deal that he would honestly have to be a fucking fool to pass up.

I told him that if he quit smoking by the end of the year that I.....wait for it........

I'll totally bottom for him the next time I see him.

You heard it hear first y'all, that how much I care about this guys health!!!!!!

And honestly, what better motivation is there for one to quit smoking than a hot piece of chocolate?

If that doesn't make you drop your box of Camels....well then there is no hope for you bb.

I suggest you snatch up some boxes of Nicorette because you have little over 2 months left on this one time special offer.