The Subway Provides Endless Jokes

What is it about the NYC subway that makes people act so damn ridiculous?

Case in point.....

This morning I met up with Columbia Girl by her new apartment in Chelsea. (P.S. how convenient is it that the one girl that I've come out to decides to move to Chelsea....LOL....could I have planned it any better?) We decided to hit up Murray's Bagels on 8th Ave because I haven't been there yet and she has been ranting and raving about it forever.

Anyways, the spot turned out to be a good choice because they have some of the best bagels I've had in my entire life! You have got to try their Whole Wheat Everything bagel....so so delicious.....

So we chatted about life, love, school, work....Valentine's Day (which is creeping up on us ppl) and a bunch of other stuff. The convo was fun and pleasant as always...made even better by the fact that I don't have to censor myself around her anymore. HAHA!

After about an hour or so of chatter she decided it was time for her to get back and change for work. We went our separate ways and I hopped on the C/E downtown to get back to Brooklyn. I realized while I was on the train that I had to go pick up something from Penthouse Girl's apartment in Murray Hill, so at Fulton Street I got off and headed for the 4/5 platform.....

So as I am waiting for the train I felt a burst of cold air on my back. Turns out that the tail end of my shirt had ridden up...no doubt caused by a combination of my mad dash to catch the train and the jeans that I was wearing.....

So as I was waiting behind the yellow line for the train, I flipped up the back of my jacket and started tucking in my shirt. Normal, totally non-suggestive activity....I was simply trying to fix myself....

I hear a whistle in the background........

Now, at first I thought nothing of it....because I was surrounded by people and one hears whistles all the time without really thinking that it *may* be directed at them. Whistles are kinda like car alarms in my opinion....no one really gives a fuck when they hear them....

So I continue to do my business....now im tucking in the side of my shirt over my right hip. All of a sudden I hear......

Hey man...looking good

So then I put two and two together and SLOWLY look over my right shoulder to see an older (late 30s-early 40s) latino man, leaning against a piling and staring at my ass! OHHHH HELLLLL NAAAAA, you know your boy K had to unleash the screw face on his ass!



Me: Come again?
Brazen Old Man: You look nice in those jeans...
Me: Wow...you cannot be serious
Brazen Old Man: You heading Uptown?
Me: {mouth agape}
Brazen Old Man: Well???????
Me: {looks around for a hidden camera, turns around to get on the train}
Brazen Old Man: Ha, worth a try....
Me:

Moral of the story: Clearly there is no other place on the planet where men are more forward than in NYC. You've gotta be pretty bold to try to pick up a guy, almost 2 decades your junior, in broad daylight, on a subway platform, AS the train is pulling into the station.

What was his major malfunction?

LMFAO...the subway I tell you....JOKES!