Friday, June 22, 2007

Ok....For reals this time

Ok...so I know that first post was kinda weak. I apologise. I spent last night and much of today thinking about how I should start up this blog. First and foremost though I want to thank Kelly from Closeted Only Child, JR from Nothing Golden Stays and Dan from A Procrastinating Wolverine for encouraging me to finally take the plunge and start blogging. I also want to give a special thanks to David from Protean in Utah. His blog was the first that I really had a chance to run across late last year and I’m really thankful that I did because it pretty much opened up my eyes to the whole concept of personal blogging.

Basically the reason I am starting this blog is because I just really need a place to finally start being honest and open, not only with myself but with other people as well. I am finally at a point in my life where I can start to accept the fact that I am gay and there is really nothing that can be done about it........nothing short of being dishonest and living a lie that is. However, I just don’t think that is something that anyone should have to do.

Of course I didn’t always feel like this. There was a time when I was younger when I thought that maybe this was just a phase, you know, something that every guy goes through (so naive...but hey, you know you probably thought the same thing too) When that didn’t work, I turned to prayer, hoping that somehow God would make me straight. Well, when that didn’t work I started tossing around the idea that maybe I was just bisexual or perhaps I just hadn’t met the right girl yet. All the while, trying to tip-toe around the issue that I knew in my heart, I had already had the answer to.

I am sure that many of you reading this blog will be able to relate to a lot of my feelings regarding finally reaching some sort of acceptance with yourself. I mean, being gay is really tough! There is so much baggage, and so much to shit to deal with I really wish I didn’t have to. But thankfully, at least I am in a place now where feel like I am somewhat moving in the right direction ( and I am scared as fuck!!!!!! )

Anyways, this blog is just going to be my personal space to rant, rave and talk about things that I otherwise wouldn’t be able to get off my chest, or share with anyone in my life.....at least not yet. I am going to try to keep it as light-hearted as possible, throwing in some random shit here and there. Obviously I will be talking and sharing some really personal and important things, but every post shouldn’t be (and will not be) all doomy and gloomy. I suppose my posts will just be a reflection of how I am feeling each day. (and I will try not to ramble!) Anyways, hopefully it will be enjoyable, and you guys will stick with me through this new chapter in my life!

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